Firstly I want to say to all of you who have dads but for some reason or another are not connected with them, make contact. I literally have the best dad I could ever have…despite him not listening to me properly and jumping the gun and being a bit of a stress head I love him. He is kind, generous, wise, loving, non-judgemental and always there when I need him. He has been both a father and a mother to me over the past 12 years and I wouldn’t change him for the world!
So recently I’ve been struggling with the faithfulness of God. A few things have happened recently that have really made me begin to ask a lot of questions to God.
It is so difficult for me to be completely honest without the fear of judgement but when I am a daughter of God’s, I have no fear of man. I have felt recently like I have been floating along in my life as a generic Christian. Asking questions like, what kind of relationship do I have with God? Is my relationship the same as other peoples? Is there relationship better than mine? What do they have that I know I’m missing?
This is not something I need to worry about. This is not something that God allows me to worry about. I AM A CHILD OF GOD’S! My relationship with him is exactly that, it’s my relationship. I shouldn’t compare my relationship with God with other peoples. I do however have a responsibility to make sure that I spend time with him, reading my bible, praying and making sure I listen.
Something else that I have come to realize recently…..He gives us peace. The peace is already provided for us. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4v6-7.
I recently applied for nursing college here in Cape Town which starts in January. I applied at the end of July but was unable to get all of my papers in in time so I found out a week or so ago that I didn’t get in. During the time of waiting I had a sense of peace about it all. I even had a dream a few days before that – my receiving a letter saying that I didn’t get in. I know God has a plan for my life and I am trusting that He will provide for me. I opened a door. God said not right now. I don’t have to worry about pressures of the world either…..’oh you should be studying’ etc, God has a plan. I am on loan to the world. He wants what’s best for me.
After writing this blog and not posting it I had a dream where God revealed himself to me. He told me that I hadn’t gotten into nursing college and this was His plan, He wants me to continue working at the clinic. Two weeks after this a lady from England came to pray for people within the church who work in Social Ministries, she didn’t know anything about me, not even that I wasn’t Capetonian but she gave a prophetic word over me…’don’t book a plane ticket to go home, book one to come back here’. This was even more confirmation that God wants me here. So that’s what I’m going to do.